Bill Mayser loved women. And they
loved him. They loved him because he was smart. They loved him because he was
rich. They loved him because he was charming. Mostly though, they loved him
because he was absolutely gorgeous. And women love gorgeous things.
Less than twelve hours after
joining the scientific mission to Tappman, Bill had been in a supply closet
with the Captain’s wife. The Captain an old man, almost forty! He had no right
to a beautiful, buxom scientist like Matilda!
Matilda Kharn had long brown hair,
full, pouty lips, and some of the most phenomenal legs Bill had seen on any
woman who wasn’t a professional model. Matilda had practically leapt at the
chance to be with anyone who wasn’t her overbearing, workaholic husband. Lucky
for her, it had been someone handsome like Bill.
These were the thoughts running
through Bill’s mind as Captain Kharn piloted the shuttle down to Tappman from
the starship. Also, he reminisced over what a shame it was that spacesuits were
not more formfitting. Due to their rigorous physical training, all the women on
the crew were incredibly attractive. Bill had found that women of learning
tended to get a little chunky after spending all their time cooped up in the
lab rather than out exercising. Also, they tended to subscribe to the
ridiculous notion that inner beauty was more important than outer beauty. What
a load of crap!
Once they were down on the planet
Bill was going to have a difficult time trying to decide with of the women he
would secretly woo next. Phoenix was his first choice; tall, dark red hair with
bright green eyes, an athletic figure, along with a positively gorgeous ass.
Larissa was mousy and cute, very shy and bookish, which Bill normally wasn’t
interested in, but even though she was the shortest woman on the crew, she had
the largest chest. Kendra had the prettiest face of the bunch, and the only
blonde; Bill couldn’t resist a beautiful blonde, even if she was so skinny she
lacked the feminine curves Bill preferred. Adrien though, Bill wouldn’t touch her
with a ten foot pole; that lady was nuts! He didn’t care that she had raven
hair and eyes the same color as the ocean, she was one of those women who would
kill you for looking at her the wrong way and your next of kin would never find
your body!
When the shuttle finally touched
down, Bill climbed out just like everybody else and watched the group in charge
of verifying the probe’s air sample readings confirm the air was not toxic.
Then he yanked off his helmet, took a deep breath, and started to celebrate
with the others.
That is, until the Security Officer
got a bug up his ass and shouted at them to get camp set up. Bill got his tent
put up and then went to “assist” Matilda and setting up her lab.
She smiled coyly at him. “You
should be setting up your own equipment instead of skulking around someone
else’s property.” She winked knowingly.
“I’m sure it will be alright if I
just—”
“Quit lollygagging, you apes and
get a move on!” Security Officer Terrible T. Timing shouted from over by the
shuttle.
Matilda snickered. “You heard the
man, better get back to work.”
Bill eventually got his lab
equipment set up, but not before getting yelled at twice more by Damien. Then,
thankfully, Damien went out on a survey mission and Bill was able to spend some
quality alone time with Matilda.
“You’re sure your husband won’t
look for you here?” They were hiding in the tent Matilda would be sharing with
the Captain.
“He’s far too busy getting the camp
situated and planning more survey expeditions. Also, what did I tell you?” She
grinned wickedly.
“Never to talk about your husband
when we’re together.”
“Exactly! Lord knows, that man
talks about himself enough without the rest of the world doing it too.”
“Yes, ma’am!”
Bill had been worried about how he
was going to sneak out without getting spotted, but that took care of itself
when the survey team returned with some kind of living-metal ooze. The whole
camp was going mad with excitement and, truth be told, Bill was exhilarated
just like the rest of them. Sure, science wasn’t he first love, but he was
still a scientist and he was going to get to examine a newly discovered
lifeform!
It seemed as though everyone in
camp stayed up all night running tests and discussing theories. Chemically, the
ooze was pure iron, yet it seemed able to move on its own and was liquid rather
than solid at room temperature. Something was going on beyond what they were
able to observe that first night.
The next morning everyone was
groggy, but even Bill was excited for another round of surveying. As they began
to break up into groups, Bill was disappointed to see the Captain team up with
his wife and Doctor Morris. Bill saw that Larissa was alone, so he offered to
go with her and she happily accepted.
Bill smiled to himself. His good
morning looked to be turning into a great
day.
Then Damien came stomping over and
announced he would be going with them. Bill’s jaw dropped. Damien hated Bill, at least Bill thought he
did. Damien was always scowling at him and turning up unexpectedly when Bill
was alone with Matilda. He had yet to catch them in the act, but Bill was
fairly certain the Security Officer suspected there was something going on between
them.
Thus, it was with a heavy heart
that Bill followed Damien and Larissa into the forest. After several hours they
finally turned back, having found nothing of interest. Even worse though, he
had not gotten anywhere with Larissa! They had hardly spoken to one another
after Damien showed up.
Trudging into camp a little before
lunch time, Bill’s spirits were almost immediately lifted. A new metal had been
discovered! Kendra, Tobias, and Harold had brought back samples of a black
metal ooze. A fresh round of experiments began immediately and it looked as
though it was going to be another sleepless night; and in fact it was, just not
for the reasons Bill had thought.
Bill had no idea what time it was
when Matilda slipped into his lab. She pulled open her lab coat just enough to
show him she was wearing nothing underneath and then darted back outside. Bill
nearly tripped over himself running after her.
Matilda strolled leisurely out to
the perimeter of their camp, disarmed the motion detector so they could pass
through undetected, and led Bill out into the forest. They came to a stop by
little lagoon that was steaming in the cold night air.
“We found this at the beginning of
our survey,” Matilda explained. “It’s a natural hot spring.” She slipped off
her lab coat and waded into the pool.
Bill dropped his pants and jacket
on a rock at the edge of the spring and stepped in to go to Matilda.
“I’ve been waiting all day for
this,” she told him as they embraced.
A long while later, the two of them
were soaking in the shallows.
“Should I be jealous of you
spending the morning in the wilderness with Larissa?”
Bill scoffed. “With Damien tagging
along? Even if I had wanted to I couldn’t have gotten near her. You’re the only
woman for me!”
She splashed water into his face.
“You’re such an awful liar! How is it that you get women to sleep with you when
you can’t lie your way out of a paper bag?”
“I can lie!”
Matilda laughed. “Prove it! Tell me
something and I will tell you whether it’s true or not. And you can’t lie about
whether or not you’re telling the truth!”
“Alright, but only if you play
too.”
“Deal. You go first.”
“Let me see…I was seven when I
first kissed a girl I wasn’t related to.”
“Lie!”
“Ugh, you’re right. I was four.”
“My turn.” She chewed on her lip as
she thought. “You are the first man I’ve cheated on my husband with.”
Bill considered for a moment.
“True,” he said at last.
She splashed him again. “If you’re
going to play the game, play seriously! Don’t try to flatter me.”
“Alright, that was a lie.”
“Yes it was. You are the eighth man
I’ve cheated on him with. Your turn again.”
“My mother died when I was young.”
She stared into his eyes. “Lie.”
Bill nodded. “She ran away with a
college student.”
“My mother disapproved of my
marrying Orson.”
“True.”
“Very good.”
“The first girl I actually loved
broke my heart.”
“True, but that’s not the whole
story.”
Bill sighed. Why had he brought
Georgia up? Talking about her only made him sad. “Correct. I panicked when I
realized how committed we were getting.”
“I’m starting to think about
leaving my husband and running away with you.”
Bill stared at her. Matilda’s face
betrayed absolutely no emotion. He had
no idea whether she was lying or not. Eventually, he decided it was better to
sound arrogant than to accidentally make light of her feelings. “True.”
She giggled seductively. “Well, I
suppose I have thought about it, so
that counts as correct.”
As Bill leaned in to kiss her,
Matilda screamed in pain.
“What’s wrong?” Then Bill saw it. A
black shadow looming behind Matilda with Doctor Harold’s face.
Matilda choked and shook as black
metal ooze poured forth from Harold’s hand and began to cover Matilda’s bare
skin.
Bill turned and ran. Instinct was
all he could attribute grabbing his clothing to, because stark panic was all he
felt as he ran. After about five minutes of headlong sprinting, he paused to
yank on his clothes, and then he was off and running again. He did not stop
until he reached the camp.
Damien had taken charge and
gathered everyone around the shuttle. A hasty explanation about an experiment
seemed to satisfy them as to why he and Matilda had been out in the forest at
night. Unfortunately, the relief of his deception not being questioned was
short lived.
Matilda, now transformed into an
ooze-monster, returned to camp with Harold within moments of Bill finishing his
story. Adrien ran into the shuttle and Damien told everyone but Phoenix and the
Captain to follow her. Bill did not hesitate to do as he had been told.
Inside the shuttle everyone but
Adrien was gathered around the cockpit windows watching the three crewmembers
fire round after round at Harold and Matilda. Bill could hear Adrien rummaging
around in the back of the shuttle, but it was hard to care what she was doing.
The firefight was mesmerizing; terrifying, but mesmerizing.
Matilda and Harold just kept
coming. Eventually they were so close that Damien was fighting Matilda hand to
hand. “Eureka!” Adrien shouted from the back of the shuttle. Everyone in the
shuttle turned to watch her go sprinting past them and down the ramp.
Nearly in unison, they turned back
to the cockpit window. Adrien threw something at Harold and he exploded. Then
the Captain was pointing his gun at Adrien and shouting while Damien started
beating Matilda with his fists. To everyone’s shock, Damien was able to smash
Matilda into a pile of black goo without getting infected.
Everyone cheered.
And then they screamed. The captain
had shot Damien.
Damien went down hard. Doctor
Morris went rushed out of the shuttle to help him. Most of the others followed.
Bill stayed and watched Captain Kharn turn and run into the forest.
His heart pounding in his chest and
everyone running around screaming, Bill decided now was as good a time as any
for a stiff drink. He returned to his tent, grabbed the most potent bottle of
liquor he had, and proceeded to get as drunk as drunk can be.
When Bill finally woke up the first
thing he did was swear to God that he would never drink again. Then he
staggered outside to find that the sun was high overhead and, far worse than a
wasted morning and a horrendous hangover, Harold and Matilda had returned.
Larissa and Doctor Morris had been infected and Adrien had blown up half the
shuttle driving them off. On top of all of this, it seemed that Damien had been
infected by the iron metal and instead of becoming a mindless killer he had
developed an immunity to the black ooze and super-strength to boot.
Bill learned all of this after he
was pressed into service trying to put out the fire still burning in the
shuttle cockpit. Altogether, Bill had chosen a rather poor morning to be hung
over.
*
After the shuttle fire was finally
extinguished, Tobias and Kendra returned from their futile attempt to find the
Captain and convince him to return to camp. Evidently though, the expedition
had not been entirely in vain. They had discovered a third metal, and while no
one else seemed to particularly care about this news because they all believed
they were doomed, Bill found himself incredibly excited.
Bill took one of the samples back
to his lab and stared at it for a long time. The idea that had come almost
instantly to his brain was insane, wasn’t it? What if the copper metal had the
same effect as the black metal? What if it was worse? Bill weighed these
arguments silently against the prospect of super-strength and immunity to
infection. As he deliberated, he pulled out the bottle he had been drinking the
night before and took a drink, there was just too much going on to face without
a little liquid courage.
Six or seven drinks later, Bill dipped
the tip of his little finger into the petri dish. As he saw it, having two
super-people would double the team’s chances of getting home, while if he
turned into a horrible monster then he would hardly give a damn one way or the
other, so what the hell, why not? It made perfect sense to Bill in his current
state.
At first nothing happened. Then his
little finger began to tingle and slowly, oh so slowly, copper began to climb
up his finger toward his hand. Giddy, Bill withdrew his hand from the petri
dish to see if he was going to get monster-ified. Nothing happened. No rapid
infection, just a copper pinky. Bill jammed his whole hand back into the dish
and let it soak up all the copper in it. Then he went to find more samples so
he could develop his super-strength faster.
But first, a celebratory drink!
After pouring one sample on his
chest and another down his opposite arm from the one he had tested first, a
thoroughly intoxicated Bill stumbled out of his lab to inform the others that
they were about to be saved.
It did not go as well as he had
hoped. No one was even remotely excited about his plan to go monster hunting.
Then Damien came out and embarrassed him in front of everyone. Dejected, he
collapsed in his cot.
For the second morning in a row,
the first thing Bill did was swear to never, ever drink again for as long as he
lived. Then Phoenix walked into his tent.
“Why did you have to come today?”
Bill groaned piteously. “Never mind, I can do this. Just give me a moment!”
“What are you rambling on about?”
Phoenix glared at him, clearly puzzled. Then comprehension hit her. “Oh! You
really are a vile, disgusting little man, aren’t you?” She shuddered. “Well,
unfortunately for me, you’re all I have. Come on.
“Where are we going?” Bill looked
around for his pants, which seemed to have gone missing during the night.
“Remember your idiotic speech last
night? You were pretty drunk, so you might not, but the gist of it was that you
wanted to go after the Metalloids while they were still weak from Adrien
blowing them up and that’s exactly what we’re going to do.”
“It is? I mean, of course it is!
Hell, yeah!”
“Shut up and find your pants. We’re
leaving before everyone else wakes up.”
Thus, Bill found himself in the
forest, heading towards the mountains with Phoenix, Kendra, and Tobias. They
trudged along for what seemed like forever, but when Bill glanced up to see the
sun still low in the sky, he realized it was just the hangover making it feel
as though he had been walking forever.
“You don’t look so great,” Kendra
said as she handed him a bottle of water.
“I feel like I’ve been flushed out
an airlock.” He took the water gratefully.
“How dumb do you have to be to get
drunk at a time like last night?”
“As dumb as me.”
Kendra shook her head and moved on.
Bill reflected that that had not been one of his more charming moments. At this
point he hardly cared. Well, perhaps he cared a little bit. Blondes were a bit
of a weakness of his.
Bill caught up with Kendra. “What
brings you out here?”
She looked at him as though he had
just tried to eat a pickle by shoving it in his ear. “I want to help make sure
we survive this.”
“Well yes, I understand that.
Phoenix wishes she could be a soldier like Damien. Tobias wants the glory that
comes from saving the day. But you don’t really seem like the fighting type.”
Kendra grinned mischievously.
“You’d be surprised what you don’t know about me.”
“I’m willing to learn.”
She laughed. “I’ll just bet you
are. Sadly for you, I don’t sleep with whores. Especially not stupid ones.”
Bill’s winning smile faltered.
“Excuse me?”
“I’ve caught you ogling me a half a
dozen times. You’ve made a pass at Phoenix and Larissa multiple times. And I’m
pretty sure you were sleeping with our insanely jealous Captain’s wife. That,
combined with your copious drinking makes me wonder if you ought to be wearing
a helmet.”
“A helmet?”
“Yeah, I know, it would mess up
your perfectly quaffed hair, but I think it would go a long way towards
protecting you from yourself.”
“How dare you!”
“How dare I? Ha! How can you even
ask that? You intentionally infected yourself with an unknown biological agent,
putting us all at risk. What if you had transformed like the other Metalloids?
You could have killed us all just because you were drunk and stupid!”
“I—you—well—get out of my face!”
Bill blustered.
“You know what? No, I will not get
out of your face!” Kendra shot back. “You need a serious ass kicking or
something else that will make you realize that people’s lives are on the line!”
“I realize that people’s lives are
at stake!”
“Do you? Because so far you’ve
treated this whole misadventure like some kind of game where you score points
by scoring with different women!”
“Why are you so mean all of the
sudden? I thought you were the nice girl on the expedition!”
Kendra punched him in the jaw.
“Ow! What was that for?”
“Being a stupid whore,” she told
him calmly.
“Stop calling me that!”
She punched him in the jaw again.
“What the hell is wrong with you?”
“You seem to be a slow learner.”
“What am I supposed to be learning?”
This time, Bill dodged her punch.
“How to duck, for one.”
“You’re insane, aren’t you?”
“I am trying to be whatever the
group needs me to be, can you say the same?”
Then she walked away from him.
Bill was left wondering what had
just transpired here. Normally, he assumed that a woman yelling at him meant
she was playing hard to get, but something about the things Kendra had said
made him question his usual ironclad confidence.
They travelled the rest of the day
mostly in silence. Bill found himself oddly introspective. He barely paid any
attention at all when Kendra and Phoenix debated over which way to go.
Eventually, Kendra just let Phoenix lead the way. As they climbed higher up
into the mountains and the sun began to set, that silence grew more ominous. “Maybe
we ought to go back,” Bill offered hesitantly. “We won’t be able to find them
in the dark.”
“A little while longer,” Phoenix
said.
It was fully dark when Bill spoke
up again. “Really, we aren’t going back? I can’t see a thing.”
“I hate to admit it, but he’s
right,” Tobias said. “Let’s head back and try again tomorrow. Perhaps we’ll
have better luck convincing Damien to join us in the morning.”
“Fine, but—oh God!” Phoenix
screamed as she opened fire at the Metalloids converging on them from out of
the night.
Bill stepped forward, finally proud
to be capable of doing something useful, and the Metalloid nearest to him
knocked him on his ass. Flabbergasted, Bill leapt to his feet and tried to
fight it again. He punched it as hard as he could in the back.
Nothing happened.
He punched again. And again. And
again. Eventually, the Metalloid, it was Doctor Morris, turned around swung at
him lazily. Bill dodged easily. Then another Metalloid, Matilda, lunged at him
and he easily avoided her too. Everyone seemed to be fighting in slow motion.
Panic and understanding set in
almost simultaneously. The copper metal gave him a different power than
Damien’s iron. He had super-speed instead of strength.
The Metalloids were converging on
Kendra, no doubt she would be infected within seconds. Tobias was on the other
side of the Metalloids from Bill, he was frantically pulling Phoenix away,
trying to get her to flee with him.
Bill turned and ran.
The forest was a blur around him.
He had no idea how fast he was running, but it was several times faster than he
had ever been able to run before bonding with the copper metal. He ran all the
way back to camp. When he arrived he collapsed, sure that Damien was going to
kill him for abandoning the others. Instead though, Damien insisted he lead
them back to where they were attacked so the others could be rescued.
Bill didn’t know whether to heave a
sigh of relief because this would ease his guilty conscience or to cry because
he was being forced back out into the night with the Metalloids roaming the
land fully reformed.
*
Everyone else seemed to be moving
so terribly slow as Bill led them back up the mountain. When at last they
arrived, Damien surveyed the tracks leading away from the ambush site.
After his deliberation, Damien
announced that there were two sets of tracks. He took Adrien to follow the
trail that led further up the mountain while he sent Bill and Benji down
towards a valley. Then, for good measure, he threatened Bill with a goodly
amount of violence if they lost the trail.
Once Adrien and Damien were gone,
Bill turned to Benji. “Have you ever followed a trail in the dark?”
Benji shook his head. The poor guy
seemed to be taking the whole imminent death thing pretty hard. He looked worse
than Bill had felt this morning when he was hungover.
“Ever follow a trail ever?”
Benji shook his head again.
“Damn. I was hoping you were
secretly some kind of outdoorsman. You ever go camping?”
“I didn’t really enjoy the outdoors
as a child. I preferred staying indoors and reading where the chance of
stumbling upon poisonous insects was far, far more remote.”
“Yeah, me too.”
Benji arched an eyebrow
skeptically.
“So they were dirty magazines! I
was still technically inside looking at printed materials.”
“Who has dirty magazines anymore?”
“They were classics passed down
from father to son! Why, they were practically antiques!”
“I think we might be getting a
little distracted.”
“Oh, no we’re not!” Bill insisted.
“I am completely focused on putting off getting lost in the forest at night for
as long as possible.”
Benji shook his head balefully.
“Come on, let’s go.”
They walked for about an hour,
following what they hoped was the trail Phoenix and Tobias had left as they
fled through the woods. Then, quite unexpectedly, Phoenix stepped out of the
trees in front of them.
“I never thought I’d be glad to see
you, but damn I’m glad someone found us!” As she walked forward Tobias also
came striding out of the darkness.
“We weren’t lost!” Tobias insisted.
“We were just making our way back to camp by a different route.”
Phoenix rolled her eyes. “Where are
Damien and Adrien?”
“They followed the other trail,”
Benji told her in the dejected monotone he seemed stuck speaking in.
“What other trail?”
Benji shrugged. “Damien said there
were two trails. He and Adrien followed one and we came this way.”
“We have to go now!” Phoenix
insisted. She then began pulled them back the way they had come.
Bill and the others followed.
“What’s the big hurry?”
“The other trail was left by the
Metalloids after they swarmed Kendra! They’ll be walking into a group of six
Metalloids!”
“Six?”
“Yes, can’t you count? The four who
were already infected, plus the Captain and Kendra.”
“The Captain is infected?”
“Did you not see a single thing at
that fight before your ran off? There were five Metalloids there!”
Phoenix was able to follow the
trail back to where they had been ambushed and from there she led them up the
mountain along the path Damien and Adrien had taken.
“She seems to have no trouble
following a trail in the dark,” Benji observed. “I bet she went camping a lot.”
“Hey, we found them!”
“Actually, we were retracing our
steps when we came across you guys,” Tobias admitted bashfully. “Phoenix may
have been right about us getting lost.”
“I still say it counts!”
“Will you three shut up?” Phoenix
hissed. “I think I see something.”
“You think you see something? Do you or don’t you and should we already
be running?” Bill asked.
“Well, look for yourself.” Phoenix
pointed at a patch of ground not too far ahead of them.
“I don’t see anything.”
“That’s because you only looked for
a second. Watch it closely.”
“I still don’t—oh. What the hell is
it?”
“It looks like the black metal
ooze,” Benji said. “Only it’s a cave mouth. Almost like it’s a cave made out of
the black ooze.”
“So…what you’re saying is that yes we should have been running
already?” Bill asked nervously.
“If we’re going to save Damien and
Adrien we have to go in,” Phoenix told them resolutely.
“Are you sure? Maybe we should just
wait here and see if they come out on their own.”
“No, Damien would have gone down
there and he won’t be coming out until he finds out whether or not we’ve been
infected. Since we’re out here he won’t be able to know one way or the other
and he won’t come out. We have to go in after him!”
There was a bright flash of light
about ten feet from the cave entrance and suddenly Adrien was standing where
the light had flashed.
Adrien looked around, saw them, and
ran straight to Phoenix. “Thank God you’re here! The tunnel walls started
shifting and the Metalloids were all of the sudden all around me!”
“Where’s Damien?” Phoenix demanded.
Adrien shook her head. “He’s gone.”
“What do you mean gone? He can’t be
gone!”
“The tunnel shifted and we were
separated. I heard shouting and then a struggle. Then the Metalloids converged
on me and I…left. I’m sorry, Phoenix, but there is no way Damien made it out of
there. The Metalloids came after me as soon as they were finished with him.
He’s gone.”